Shlomo Meets His Baker

Ya na na na na na nigh na na nigh nigh 
Ya na na na na na nigh na na nigh nigh 
Ya na na na na na nigh na na nigh nigh 
Nigh nigh nigh nigh nigh

Ya na na na na na nigh na na nigh nigh 
Ya na na na na na nigh na na nigh nigh 
Ya na na na na na nigh na na nigh nigh 
Nigh na nigh nigh nigh

Under sun that never quits
Hard work in the fields and pits
I broil in the tall grass 
Soil in my hairy ass
– all I ever do is shvitz!

When harvesting the lots
I saw that the wheat had spots
Ominously vague 
Obviously a plague
-All I knew to do was plotz!
Oy oy oy oy oy oy oy yoy yoy!

Ya na na na na na……

For sugar it’s a pain
Extracting the juice from cane
You wouldn’t think a Jew did 
Work while it was humid
But do we love to complain

The nectar had a smell
Not sweet like a caramel
Ominously brine
Obviously a sign
That I’m gonna go to hell!
Oy oy oy oy oy oy oy oy oy!

Ya na na na na na……..

Now cows they have their schtick 
Pull hard and they might just kick
If you want your butter
Go gentle on the udder
That’s what really does the trick 

But something went awry
I’d pull but the pail was dry
Ominously god
Obviously did trod
So I called up the rabbi!

And he said:

“So you don’t have any sugar butter flour
Holy signals comin’ from a higher power 
I know a supermarket open at this hour
And god says you must go!”

So to the aisle with the  cottage cheese and lox schmear
I grabbed the one on sale and stepped up to the cashier
Paid With a coupon but my conscience wasn’t clear 
Yet I bought some cookie dough

From the oven vent
Came a heavenly scent
That compelled my mouth to drool
no self-control,
No mortal soul could 
Resist each golden brown jewel

Then deep within 
Grew a gnawing knot
Something I could not ignore
Like a burning flame
Came the guilt and shame
Cause I bought them at the store

All I wanted to
was to bake a few
From the things that grew on the land
But the rabbi stressed
That the signs were blessed
And that this was god’s command!

So I fin’lly took that bite 
And all that was wrong seemed right 
Chewily propitious
Oh God, they were delicious
Yet He did not seem to delight

Dark clouds formed overhead 
Then He the eternal said:
“Always be afraid
if they’re not homemade”
And then lightning struck me dead!
Oy oy oy oy oy oy oy oy oy oy oy oy oy oy vey!  

Ya na na na na na…….